Ali-ette Episode 8

Hey, it's the episode where we get to meet the families! And we all know it wouldn't be 'The Bachelor/Bachelorette' if at least one of the families wasn't completely crazy, right? And now we all know the crazy landed with Kirk's fam. Poor guy.

But before we get to Kirk, it opens with Roberto's family. Now, can I just state my annoyance that Ali doesn't even try to pronounce Roberto correctly? Talk about gringo. What she says is 'Ruh-burt-o". And what she should at least try to say is 'Roe-bear-toe'. It's lame because you'd think if she really liked the guy she'd at least try to say his name the way his family and friends say it. But whatevs.

(Also, while we're on the subject of annoying things Ali does, her laugh which was once endearing to me is officially getting on my nerves. It almost sounds like glorified crying. And she keeps laughing at weird times. I think it's the alkie.

Also, even still on the subject of annoying things Ali does, has anyone found it really off-putting how she says 'mmm hmmm' when she's talking to someone? And she almost does it in an interruptive way. It's odd).

Moving on...

Ali and Roberto start the date off at the baseball diamond. And hubba hubba we get to see Roberto in his baseball uniform. Every girl's dream. And then of course after Ali hits a few balls on the diamond, she's got to get her alcohol in. Every time they show Ali this season, she's got a drink in hand. Me thinks she relies on the alkie too much to get her comfy.

Roberto comes from a super awesome family and they're also super over-protective; especially Roberto's dad. He's not sure Ali deserves Roberto as her 'prize'. He truly treats Roberto that that is exactly what he is. But I love his family because his mom and sister are both named Olga and his mom was rockin' some awesome calves. 'Olga' . 'Ole....Ga'. Hmmm... it has a nice ring to it. Perhaps this baby I'm about to give birth to should be named Olga. Ya know, if it's a girl.

But back to Roberto's family. Did you see the latin dancing? They didn't show a ton of Roberto's moves, but he had the latin swagger goin' on and Ali would be crazy not to keep him just for the dancing. Know what I mean? I was happy Ali didn't eliminate Roberto. He's clearly a great choice for her.

As is Chris.
I can't decide who I like better. Chris or Roberto. Roberto or Chris.
Chris's (Chris' ?) hometown date was pretty great too. His family clearly adores him (but I was worried a little because his sisters-in-law look like they could be twins and Ali clearly doesn't look like she could be the 'triplet' of the three). They worship the ground that guy walks on. Chris's (Chris'? Seriously, what's the correct punctuation here?) dad may be a teense too attached. I got the feeling that if Chris and Ali were to get married, they'd be stuck living with Chris' dear old Dad. But hey, the house is cute so maybe it would be okay.
I think everything changed between Chris and Ali when Chris gave her that 'Dennis' bracelet?
All I know is I want one of those bracelets too. Who's Dennis and how do I get him to make me one?
Besides Chris' super aggressive style of kissing, I really like him. I just hope he doesn't take Ali's face off on accident one of these days.

Next up, Kirk's hometown date.
It was really no surprise to me that Kirk is the one who was eliminated this week. What with the giveaway previews a couple weeks ago and the crazy taxidermy dad, it was super obvious.
Look, taxidermy is one thing but actually freezing the animals on your 'to do' list next to your otter pops and fish sticks is another. And worse, he showed his frozen treats to Ali. Ick.

How creepy was the line, "So Ali, would you like to go see my basement?" The way that guy moved his head and said that line was like something out of a horror movie. I could basically hear 'Psycho' music playing in the background. And the music was still playing when he showed Ali the caribou foot he mounted and then put red eyes on it.
That. Was. Just. Weird.

Since Kirk's parents are divorced, we got to visit his mom seperately. Clearly she's a little more normal than her ex-hubby. But she also has some issues... like with the Lance Armstrong bracelet. Look, mold exposure is not the same thing as cancer, lady. She should have found a mold exposure bracelet. Ya know, something green that suited the purpose. And then her crazy story about how her bracelet finally broke and that it signified Kirk breaking free (of mold exposure) too? Umm... yeah. Not her best moment. It's a good thing she had adult braces on. She has a special place in my heart for having to wear those babies on National TV. I can't even smile normal for pictures because of mine. However, I'd like to think that I talk like a normal person with them on. Kirk's mom, however? Not so much.
One thing that Kirk did which I found super annoying was how he talked about his ability to FINALLY be ready to bring someone home to meet his parents. Uh, okay Kirk. Do you really think we're so stupid that the producers didn't have something to do with that whole arrangement? Did you really think you'd get to the final four and not have to do the hometown visit like everyone else? Uh, yeah. This was not your decision, dude.
At the end after Kirk got cut, he lamented in the limo about how this was the first time in his whole life he'd had his heart broken. And then I was simply elated that he was the one to go. Everyone should have their heart broken a couple times. Kirk, this will be good for you. I promise.

And last but not least...

Frank.

Okay. Can we talk about Frank's sickly disgusting wife beater/too-small-brown-sweater combo for a sec? I CANNOT believe he thinks it's okay to wear a wife beater on a hometown date. Or ever. And the sweater? Haven't we seen that sick piece of trash earlier in the season too? And then when he and Ali were out and about, he paired it with that ill-fitting military jacket with the tiny sleeves.
Frank, I have a little secret for you, dude. NO one and I mean NO ONE wants to see your man cleavage. I'm more and more convinced every week that your big secret to Ali (which will be revealed next week ... can't wait) will be that you're gay. You just fit that mold all. too. well.
Also, Frank's constant insecurities are about the biggest turn off EVER.
I cannot for the life of me understand what Ali sees in Frank. He has red flags popping up all over the place. To me, Frank screams the type of guy who finally commits to you, gets married, and then up and leaves in the middle of the night never to be seen again. He's unstable. Also, his sister said something very telling about him. She said he's an emotional person who bases all his decisions with his heart and that with what he's 'been through', she's worried about him. Hmmm... what has Frank 'been through'?
I think we find out next week, but I would love to hear your guesses in the comments. Enlighten me.

Next up, we have the rose ceremony. And like I already said, Ali picks the two greatest guys in the group and then... FRANK. And also like I already said, I just don't get it. Especially because what Frank was wearing at the rose ceremony was quite possibly the strangest clothing combination yet. Jeans. With some weird jacket underneath his suit coat.

It's a good thing Ali looked nice. I LOVED her dress. Definitely her best rose ceremony dress of the season if you ask me. Now, if only someone would fix her roots so there weren't three or four shades of blonde, that would be great. Oh, and she should definitely start wearing waterproof mascara too. Got that producers? Kthanks.


Please. I simply must know your take on the episode. Or at least hear you validate my hatred for Frank and his icky doubly-bad clothing ensembles.