The BACH Finale Recap

I had butterflies ALL DAY yesterday in anticipation for 'The Bachelorette' finale. It's hard to know where to start. I got together with a bunch of fun girls and we stayed up really late watching it, laughing, making fun of Ed's gay clothes and eating. Ready? Here we go...

• Ed, Your shorts suck. I hate them. I almost hate them as much as your sick tank tops from the '80's. ICK! I also hated your pink shirt.

• Ed, your Caesar hair is so so bad. Every time it was hanging down in your face, I wanted to put some gel in my hands and push it back up. You look SO MUCH better when it's out of your face. 3/4 of the show had you looking like you just woke up. Better yet, you just woke up and put your dirty tank and mildewed green mankini shorts back on. You make me sick, Ed! SICK!

• The shot of Jillian's dad and Ed both crossing their legs minus shoes made me feel really weird.

• I really want Jillian's hair. Even when she was dripping wet with sweat and tears at the end, it still looked good.

• Jill, your outfit on the boat with Kiptyn was so gross. It reminded me of 80's UNITS with it's one-piece style and pastel colors.

• Kiptyn, the last two episodes have made me want YOU to be the winner. You are clearly in love with Jillian, but just haven't been able to admit it yet (until it's too late, of course). Plus, I really liked those blue board shorts. Are you short? I can't tell.

• The volcanic eruption shot. Ew. REALLY??!

• The Neil Lane Diamond rings. Oh mamma. Kiptyn's ring was WAY better than Ed's. Ed, you stink!

• Reid, Reid, Reid. What in the heck were you wearing when you hopped out of the red minivan? No shoes? UNtucked shirt? Sweaty, fluffy hair, wrinkly pants, wrinkly sports coat and wrinkly shirt? REID! I'm dissapointed. But I did like that you came back on and gave it a go. But you should know that any time you get picked last out of three people you're not going to get taken back. But I was sad for you. Really, I was.

• Kiptyn, I was so sad when I saw you get out of the limo FIRST. I really think you were in love with Jillian. Ed was just fake. He said 'I love you' all the time, but there was no feeling behind it. Something was just missing with Ed. But not with you, Kip. Not with you. Please say you'll be the next Bachelor. Bring those blue board shorts if you do. K?

• Jillan, why didn't you do your hair for the cameras like the previous bachelorettes so I can see how it's done? Am I supposed to believe you actually did your nails yourself with that little 'removing your nailpolish' scene? Puhlease. Also, your cry is sort of forced and annoying. I no likey.

Overall, it was a good show. I'm a little bummed that I have to wait until tonight for the 'After the Final Rose' show, but whatever. I hope Ed's hair is in check and I REALLY hope he's not wearing a pink shirt. I want Chris Harrison to announce that Kiptyn is the next Bachelor. That will make me so happy. At least with Jillian picking Ed, their kisses will look more normal. Kiptyn looks like he's eating nachos when he kisses Jillian. It's hard to watch.

Can't wait until tonight!

Were you happy with the results? DO tell.